Goodbye my dear friend

Today I say goodbye to my friend and companion of 14 years and my heart will forever be touched by his spirit.  Murray was the best dog a person could ever want and for that I am eternally grateful that he called my house home.  I will always love him for his gentleness and calmness.  This sweet old man could be trusted with any baby...they could pull his ears, examine his teeth, ride him, push him {and they DID}...and he would simply respond with kindness.  Even in these last years with failing health and fraught with arthritis, he would have spurts of energy and youthfulness that reminded me of when he was young and would chase after anything you threw...he wouldn't retrieve and return...just retrieve :) I think that's what makes this decision SO hard...those brief moments when he seems better.

As I sit down to write this entry, I reflected back on entries from the past and realize I've been preparing for this day for at least two years.  It  has been written that pain is transforming and compassion arises out of broken hearts.  Today my heart is {BROKEN}...but I also have compassion for his suffering.  I am sad that Murray will not lie on the throw rug by my bed each night as he has for the past 14 years...sad that he will not say good morning with a howl {although it's been a while since he had energy or the voice to do that}, sad that I will never again catch him {sneaking}out the driveway {again, been a while}...sad that I will no longer look for my shoes in the living by his spot...sad that I will not be able to look into his sweet brown eyes.  However, I am relieved that I will no longer have to witness the pain of him climbing the stairs...sitting down...eating...just moving, really.

He has suffered for too long.

Rest in PEACE my friend...I was blessed to know you.

Murray

B. July 30, 1998

D. July 22, 2013